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that girl there

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Friends Only [
Oct 31, 2022 @ 06:08pm
]
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Icon And Writing Awards [
Apr 06, 2021 @ 01:26am
]
This is a random post for all my icon and drabble awards because I don't feel like having my userinfo be so long. So yeah...I'll just keep adding to this as I get them.

awardsCollapse )
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[
Jun 12, 2007 @ 12:23pm
]
is it any wonder?Collapse )
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[
Jun 07, 2007 @ 09:25am
]
Tonight I Can Write by Pablo Neruda

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, 'The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.


I Carry Your Heart With Me by e.e. cummings

I carry your heart with me
(I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it
(anywhere I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate
(for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world
(for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)
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W [
May 17, 2007 @ 02:45pm
]
Sarah gave me a W...

Leave a comment and I'll give you a letter; then you have to list 10 things you like or love starting with that letter. Post them in your journal and give out new letters to your commenters in turn.

1. Women
2. Water (to drink, to swim in, rain, etc.)
3. Wind (a nice breeze is always welcome)
4. Whistler (I miss that show)
5. Wolfcry (great book by Amelia Atwater-Rhodes
6. Writing
7. Winter (everything's beautiful with snow all over it)
8. Whales
9. Weekends
10.Waves
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spashley icons [
May 16, 2007 @ 12:55pm
]
Spash IconsCollapse )
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words_challenge superstition [
May 02, 2007 @ 03:32pm
]
Title:Twins

Word Count126

-------------------------------------------------------------

As children, we held hands and purposely jumped on all the cracks in the sidewalk, knowing full well that Mom would be fine when we got home from school.

We only picked up pennies that were tails side up. Every Saturday we stood outside Mrs. Miller’s house, waiting for her black cat to walk by. When Dad was fixing the roof, we ran under the ladder as many times as we could.

In the funhouse at the carnival, we didn’t like the way the mirrors made us look. So we broke them all. We were banned from the carnival that night, but bad luck didn’t follow us around for the next seven years.

Being born on the same day was all the luck we ever needed.
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for skins_contest [
Apr 24, 2007 @ 10:44pm
]
Title: Stay
Word Count: 395

--------------------------------------

“Oh, wow, lovely,” she says, taking the flower from his hands. Her cheeks turn pink.

“It’s nothing really,” he tells her, hand shoved in his pockets, staring at the ground.

She opens her mouth to speak, but abruptly closes it as his phone starts to ring. He smiles apologetically and fishes it out of his pocket. The moment he answers it, she starts to walk away. The moment she hears him say “Hey Michelle,” she starts to run.

Her tears hit the sidewalk in time with her feet. She doesn’t stop until she reaches the bench at the top of the hill. Her stomach sinks as she remembers that this is the same place she went before; the same place where she tried to end her pain. It was because of him that time too.

She wonders why she isn’t as loveable as Michelle. Why can't he love her the same way? She remembers the flower and looks down to find her fist closed tightly around it. She’d been squeezing the life out of it as she ran. She throws it to the ground and wishes she could crush her own life away.

Closing her eyes, she tilts her face towards the sun, letting it slowly dry her tears. She would give anything to be back on that trampoline, lying beside him and holding his hand. She would give her life for him.

She hears footsteps behind her but doesn’t open her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he tells her. She feels him sit down next to her.

“For what? I know I’m not important. You should go to Michelle.” She has no idea why she’s telling him this, but she doesn’t stop. “I don’t mind.”

“Are you sure? I guess we could do this another time, right?” he asks. She nods, but doesn’t speak. “I’ll see you later then Cass.”

She feels his lips lightly graze her cheek. The tears start to come again. She told him to go, but he didn’t have to. She hoped that he would stay with her, but he obviously didn’t want to. So she finds herself alone, like always.

She lies down in the dirt next to that flower and cries. She wants to blame him, but she knows that it’s her fault. If she wasn’t so ugly, so fat, so terrible, he would have stayed.

He would have stayed.
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[
Apr 24, 2007 @ 02:21pm
]
Title:what she needs
Word Count: 149

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

girl severely beaten and raped; attacker evades police

that was the newSpaper headline the morning after the police found racHel floating in the river. alivE.

she was walking home from school when he took her. pulled her into a vaN and drove away. no one noticEd.

when she didn’t come homE that night, mom figured she forgot to call. dad suspecteD she was at a party when she was really Screaming for help.

he tied her down and did what he wAnted with her. he stole her that night. dumped her in the river when her body went limp from the beating.

even after sHe was returned to us, rachel never came home.

all that’s left is a tErrified little girl who will never be the same again. she lives in constant feaR. silent rooms are filled with her screams. my sister was innOcent. she did not deserve it.
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yet another drabble [
Apr 23, 2007 @ 11:29pm
]
Title: Melting
Word Count: 136

-------------------------------------------------------

I was going to do it. I stood on the edge of that roof, ten stories up. My eyes were focused on the sidewalk, on the concrete. It filled my vision and I saw nothing else, despite the fact that I was nearly a hundred feet above it.

I started to imagine falling towards it, feeling my body hit, melting into the gray.

Lifted a foot and dangled it over the edge.

I could have done it, you know.

I would have done it, if you hadn’t grabbed me, pulled me back.

Did you save me because you felt sorry for me?

Did you save me because you love me?

Or were you just trying to be a hero?

I still don’t know if I’ll ever forgive you.

But I haven’t been to that rooftop since.
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for words_challenge [
Apr 14, 2007 @ 08:13pm
]
I wrote this on receipt paper at work today when I was bored...

Title: She Will Wait Forever
Author: uptosummat/Katy
Fandom: Skins
Rating: PG
Word Count: 118

---------------------------------------

She sits on the bench at the top of the hill and waits.

Everything is silent.

She can see the whole city, but the beautiful view does not affect her.

She wants him to come, but she knows he probably won’t.

The silence is bittersweet; she can relax, but she’d rather hear his voice.

She’d rather feel his hand slip into hers, feel his lips press lightly against her forehead.

But he never comes.

She sits on that bench until the sun goes down, until she shivers in the cold night.

When she finally gets up, she starts to dance.

Twirling in circles, she imagines his arms around her.

She doesn’t need any music.

She only needs him.
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and even more... [
Apr 13, 2007 @ 02:10am
]
Title: Listen
Rating: PG
Word Count: 141

--------------------------------------------------

It’s not just on the radio. It doesn’t only come through your speakers.

It is the birds chirping outside your window. It is the rain hitting the roof of your house.

It is car horns, footsteps on the sidewalk, and clocks ticking. It is paper being torn from a notebook, paper crumpled up, paper hitting the side of the trash can and falling to the floor. It is car keys jingling, chips crunching, and phones ringing.

It is pots clanging in the kitchen, it is people slapping high-fives, it is your kiss on someone else’s lips.

It is dogs barking, cats meowing, babies crying.

Fingers typing on a computer keyboard, people talking, children laughing.

It is the steady breathing of your lover lying next to you in bed every night.

Music is everywhere. You just have to be willing to listen.
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mooore drabble [
Apr 13, 2007 @ 02:08am
]
Title: That Song
Fandom: Skins
Rating: PG
Word Count: 144

--------------------------------------------------------

He remembered that song. How could he forget? It was the song he played as loud as he could so she could sneak in the house. Their dad would scream at him and conveniently not be able to hear her coming up the stairs.

That song didn’t make him smile anymore. It made him cry.

He lay down in the soft grass, letting the rain soak his body. His jacket covered the radio so it wouldn’t get wet.

He played the song just for her.

“One last time. So you can sneak in one last time,” he always said.

When the song was over, he stood. He was covered in mud and grass stains, but he didn’t care. He kissed the cold stone and walked away.

No matter how many times he played that song, she would never be able to sneak in again.
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[another story] [
Apr 11, 2007 @ 01:01am
]
Not So Anonymous

[word count: 100]

------------------------------------------------------


“My name is Jeff, and I’m an alcoholic.”

It was a total lie, but I didn’t know how else to get to you.

Do you remember bringing me to bed? Do you remember tossing me aside as soon as you were done? Do you remember making me feel like a piece of trash?

Probably not, since you’re actually an alcoholic. But that still doesn’t excuse what you did.

So I’ll get my revenge after this meeting; whether you remember or not.

I’ll hurt you like you hurt me. I’ve got a plan for you, don’t worry.

It’s a great plan.
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[not a real post; for words_contest onlyyy] [
Apr 11, 2007 @ 12:50am
]
Time's Up

[word count: 138]

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Time to go. Pack up your things and move on. They all know your secret now, so there’s no turning back. They’ll make your life hell if you stay.

Why didn’t you tell anyone you were a lesbian before? Maybe because you knew they’d act this way. You knew they’d turn away from you when you walked up to them. You knew they would leave the lunch table just as you sat down. You knew they wouldn’t let you in their clubs anymore.

Isn’t that discrimination? Bigotry? Intolerance? Unfairness? Does it matter?

No.

You knew they would treat you differently but you chose to tell them anyway. You knew.

Who cares? They’re not real friends if they won’t accept you, right?

Right.

But…now you’re alone. All alone with no friends and nothing to do. Alone.

Time to go.
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sixty-two [day two] [
Apr 04, 2007 @ 09:07pm
]
[ mood | depressed ]

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I felt really crappy today because Pepper was put to sleep last night. He had a urinary tract infection and his bladder exploded. I miss him so much. All day I had to keep myself from crying a million times. I did start to cry when I got in the car tonight and was talking to my mom about him.

It was way worse last night. I freaked out and I was screaming and crying that it wasn't fair and just making horrible noises while I was crying. I told Sadie (our other cat) and Murphy (dog) {though his dying had nothing to do with Murphy at all} and I cried on them. Sadie came and licked my face because she knew I was upset. :'(

The weather being all dark fit my mood...except I love the rain so it also made me feel better. The pic was taken through the windshield of Sarah's van and it's all wavy like from the rain.

*sigh*
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